The Watchmen

While my current quote may be a far too cutting indictment on Benjamin Button, I really liked Matty's word picture there. Very well put. I have yet to see the film, so I cannot offer my opinion yet, but I'm planning on posting my thoughts on the Oscar films once I've gotten the last few on the checklist. It will not be totally all-encompassing because I live in Panama City, and many of the films never have come and probably will never come here, but I am going to try to give the most thorough treatment I can.

In the mean time, I thought I'd give my thoughts on the upcoming adaptation of the graphic novel Time magazine named (for better or worse) as one of the top 100 novels of all time.



I have seen the theatrical trailer twice now, and though I was excited the first time, I now have no faith that Snyder has done the source material its due justice. Perhaps the first time I was swayed by the music (I have a soft spot for Muse’s undulating ostinatos), or maybe I was just excited to see imagery from the book translated to the silver screen. But the second time I noticed every flaw, and I have good cause to assume that this film will not work.

Even during the first viewing I was distracted by Rorschach’s voice. Apparently Snyder did not hear all the complaints concerning Bale’s guttural whisper as Batman. Most people were willing to forgive Batman’s grunting delivery because they liked the film, but why in the world did The Watchmen’s filmmakers decide to copycat that element of the Batman franchise? But aside from copycatting the tone of Batman’s voice, what really frustrates me about Rorschach’s wheeze is that it does not match his character at all. (SPOILER WARNING)

In the book Rorschach, when not wearing the mask, looks like Opie-a red-haired spindly thing whose voice probably cracks-but they have to make him sound like a throat-singer in the film. In the book he is a force to be reckoned with, not because he sounds menacing, but because he does things no one else has the stomach for. He’s a sociopath who happens to have a moral compass (of some sort). And though it seems the movie forgets, he is not a superhero. The film shows his mask morphing from ink-blot to ink-blot as if he has some kind of special ability or cool gadgetry. But no, it's just a big sock with an ink-blot on it.(CORRECTION: Actually, I just looked back at the graphic novel, and Rorschach's mask did change its images-So...it looks like the filmmakers were a bit more perceptive than I gave them credit for...mea culpa ) The Watchmen was not a comic book about superheroes, but vigilantes who wear suits. They had no special powers (except for John). But from the trailer, it is evident that Snyder wants to take the superpowers angle and exploit it.

There is a scene in which Rorschach Jackie Chans a scaffold, and a certain character tosses The Comedian across a room and out the window as if they reside in a world that abides by the gravity laws of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. I understand that Snyder is going for style here, but it is the wrong style.

The Watchmen was meant to be the ultimate noir. Dirty and depressing, its pages were rough, and its images as coarse as 12-grit sandpaper. But in its film incarnation Snyder opts for glitz over grit, giving us airbrushed explosions (that he manipulates with that trite fast-slow Matrix time technique as if the umpteen uses in 300 were not enough) and sleek costumes.

Trailers can mislead, true, but I am going out on a limb here to say that this film will not live up to the hype.